tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33119761660892332452023-12-01T23:40:28.999-08:00Hope of PeggyPeggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.comBlogger124125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-61571045445136061882010-02-22T07:09:00.000-08:002010-02-22T07:13:52.456-08:00I don't have the real pictures back yet. We are having so much fun. More of an adjustment then I thought. Just the sharing of space and figuring out where and what to keep. We had a beautiful shower with the church yesterday. It was so fun. My girlfriend sold her bedroom suite with a king bed set. I am loving setting up house, feeling like a newly wed.<div>Lillian is so precious. Glenn and I get to keep her on Friday nights while they both work. We had a great time with her. I am off to take things back and return things. Monday is my alone day. I don't go to work till 3:30. Then I work till 10 or so. Nice to have a day to myself. I can't wait to share the pictures with you. </div>Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-9896390099694339742010-02-13T18:27:00.000-08:002010-02-13T18:33:38.059-08:00We rented a jeep for the day. The other side of the island is so different. Lava rocks that the water shoots up through, we drove all day and just stopped at new beaches. One little road goes all around the island. Then we went down town. We have enjoyed each other so much. I would only wish we had a few more days. It goes so fast and now we are talking of what we need to do when we ghet home. I am excited for Glenn to get to stay and us not go back and forth. For Glenn not to be staying in my bed cause he is so big and me in Samuels room or MOllie and I staying together. I liked that part. ALso I love Samuels room. You know what I mean to get to got to bed with him and wake up and him be there. For us to start planning things we wnat to o together. WHn I am home I will put up some great pictures.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-58592106284963840942010-02-09T22:11:00.000-08:002010-02-09T22:26:04.995-08:00The wedding was perfect. It could not have been better for me. I keep reliving it all in my mind. Glenn and I are now at a gorgeous resort on Cozumel Island. Glenn has never been to the ocean nor has he been out of the country. He is loving it. It's an all inclusive place so we never think of oh we need to go out and find dinner. The beach is perfect. This morning we had a massage on the beach. Glenn had never had a massage so I think I enjoyed that more then my actual massage. He thought that was the coolest thing.<div>The only bad thing is that when I had my toes done on the wedding day my foot got cut by the lady. It killed me the evening when dancing. Now it is seeming to be worse. Yulk. Hard to keep a bandage on and clean. I am trying.</div><div>Tomorrow we are going on an ATV ride. I want to rent a scooter It's like 35 dollars for the day, There is only one road around the island I am telling Glenn I know that we won't get lost. Everyone is wondering what things have we learned about each other, he is not very fond of the ocean yet. Laying on the beach today he asked if there were sharks near here. I so wanted to lye and say of course not, they aren't in this part of the ocean. No snorkeling yet. He loves the pool.</div><div>He looked so handsome in his ca khi's and button down.</div><div>It seems like he is grasping that I don't require sleep like him and I like to go. I lay there in bed as quiet as i can. We crashed early tonight and I had to get up and do something. So here I am catching you up on my beautiful journey. I will say I wish so bad that both our children were all here. We would still have such fun just the two of us but both of us would love to enjoy watching them. You hate to get to experience something so wonderful, and not get to share it.</div><div>I looked at my dress hanging the next morning and thought oh no I wore it already, pooh. I wanted to relive it all again.</div><div>love to all of you. I tried tonight to get my pictures off the camera onto this computer but couldnt get it done. I am going to get help later in the day.</div>Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-27443603088695716922009-12-16T05:33:00.000-08:002009-12-16T05:40:23.805-08:00The hospital pictures are so precious. Donna I wanted you to get to look at them.<div>www.bellababyphotography.com</div><div>Then the password is 1213lillianhope</div><div><br /></div><div>I just can't stand it I like her so much. Cara is doing a great job. I think her milk should be in anytime. The look of love in Michaels eyes are so tender. I am so crazy that I think I am in just do mode. I have so much hair to do. I am thankful that I love it and can work so well under pressure. I don't really get to think Christmas till the 24th. People are calling and saying they need in. Right. Like that would work. I think it has caught most off guard. Sorta snuck up on us. I have been taking appt since Sept Oct for the Christmas time. End of Jan beginning of Feb is my slowest months. Perfect for a wedding. I will think of that after the new year. I am very excited to get to marry him.</div><div>If you have any great ideas for all inclusive vacation places let me know 314-452-5552 We don't really care where just so ew get to be with each other for a week. Beach and warm. </div><div>Enjoy the holiday and remember what is the reason for the season. It is eay for me to put that aside.</div><div>I wish could help with the baby more but will be able to after the trip to Houston. Mol, Glenn and I did go by last night.</div>Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-57386010003800342192009-12-13T16:17:00.000-08:002009-12-13T16:48:24.005-08:00Lillian Grace 16 lb. 15 oz. It was so incredible. Michael and I cried at the fact that Mike was not there. He would have been so proud of him. Michael and Cara did such a great job. Glenn went with me. He is so supportive. He will be the only grandpa Lillian has. He has been waiting on pins and needles with me. Feels so blessed to be a part of all of it. Takes it so serious, getting me there and waiting the whole time with me. I am very grateful for him. I am exhausted, I am a grandma which is mind boggling, how on earth can that be true. I am feeling like a young women getting ready to be married. I am so thrilled that I am one though. Mollie and I were just here thinking how is this true.<div>Here is their address, I was asked to put it in the blog. Cara Shuff is the moms name.</div><div>Michael Hope</div><div>6447 Alamo apt 2e</div><div>Clayton, mo 63105</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Samuel gets home from school on the 16th, I know he is eager to see his little niece. </div><div>I am in awe of Gods wonder. Truly you see his majesty there.</div><div>I am on cloud nine. Cara did a fabulous job, thankful for how well she took care of heself.</div><div>Make a great day. What a perfect Christmas for the Hope's</div>Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-21885721396314910112009-12-10T05:51:00.000-08:002009-12-10T06:01:49.783-08:00We are eagerly waiting our baby to come. If Cara doesn't go into labor by Saturday they are going to induce her. I am so excited to meet this little person. Michael is absolutely darling to watch with the soft clothes and getting the babies room ready.<div>I am making wedding plans, some great friends have been so helpful, I was struggling with getting comfortable with where it is and feeling great about getting to have things I want, not just settling and getting on with it. Debbie even asked me "what words do you think of when you see the wedding" wow hadn't even thought of any, just getting married. I now am so pumped about what can be done with the place. I am just as excited about all the cousins coming and my two sisters are going to come the week before and help. Sharon, Harold and Fred will be coming, it will be awesome.</div><div>Hope you are enjoying the holiday hub bub.</div><div>The wind has been like 45 to 50 with freezing temperatures, now that has been really yulky to me. I haven't started shopping, well I did get mollie something and then she saw it.</div><div>I am having Glenns mom and step father and son over for dinner tonight. Brandon hasn't met Matt yet. I can't believe I get another son. He is a really sweet guy. 19 going to college. I was just glad Glenn didn't have a girl. I don't think that would have worked really well. Mollie can so take another brother, don't know how a sister would have gone.</div><div>Love to you.</div>Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-69564405172546363842009-11-12T05:19:00.000-08:002009-11-12T06:01:42.302-08:00<div>Donna, I still can't get my email up. I have struggled not being able to communicate with you. Grateful Mary Beth has written to you for me. I love you and look so forward to Glenn getting to know you and Ed and the kids.</div><div><br /></div>Good morning, much has been going on. The crazies and the great. My computer and internet has been on the blink. It makes me nuts because Mollie's is working.<div>I had tension with a lump I found on my right breast, when I went in they were concerned with the left. Much testing done the then the procedures to have done on each breast. Also I have a tumor on the adrenal gland. Anyway all is good. Praise, by personality I think all the way through to the worst scenario then resolve with God ok I know you can help me do this so ok. Then I back back up to the today. The journey in my mind was exhausting. For the kids I know it was tough. They were awesome. So laying on the sofa Tues before the procedures Glenn kneels down and says sweet things, He usually does so I didn't right off get what he was doing. He said if the tests come out negative he wouldn't want me to ever wonder would he have asked me if they had been positive. He asked me to marry him. Boobs or no boobs, cancer or no cancer he was in for our lives. I said yes cried and was so very grateful that GOd had given to him to me.</div><div>He is an incredible man. Harold, Sharon and Fred like him, for that I was then at peace about. The big guys said they were really happy for me congrats and that he is a good man. Mollie has struggled. Samuel hasn't said much. I can't imagine what they are going through to see me with him. Glenn is the one who keeps reminding me how hurt MOllie is for a man to be in our house. He has such a tender heart.</div><div>I will tell a funny, Fred asked me if I had Really told Glenn about me. I said I tried and that he is just too in love and can't hear. Fred said maybe I should talk to him. I said no way I didn't need any favors. He was talking about my energy etc. I sure other things also. I laughed so hard.</div><div>Glen and I took tests on the computer that our pre-marriage counselor sent us. It took literally a few hours to fill out. We each did it on our own and then send it in. We were like rock stars even our counselor was amazed. Now our counselor is a friend of MIke and mine for more then twenty five years. Every once in while I see his eyes twinkle with laughter that Glenn has not idea what he is getting into. He has not been married for a very long time. He has one son who lives with his mother he is 19 and a great guy. We meet with Steve after our bible study on Wed nights for an hour, I am so thankful for this time. To work on our marriage is so important to me. I am really scared have anxiety every once in a while like I cant believe I am doing this. It is so different choosing a mate in the later years. I want someone to grow old with like the same things and who wants to love grand-babies (did It again I am to be a Nanna in like 4 weeks) He has his own big vegetable garden knows how to can, cooks and can fix anything. (ok he reads manuals) He loves to talk and tell stories, and is a wonderful servant. He is a union welder and will have to commute 45 minutes. He has worked with this company for 21 years. </div><div>We are getting married the 6th of February. 12 weeks away. I thought we should just go to the justice of the peace. He said he wanted me to come down the isle to him. Also thought it is good for the kids to see us have this so special, its all special and a commitment no matter what your age. Hasn't taken me long to get on board I love a good party. Both of our families will make a good evening. I texted Jesse my nephew and he wrote me back that he was so happy for me and it would have to be something huge for him not to be there. I will love all of them also seeing Michael's baby. He and Cara are doing really well. I adore Glenn's mom. Her faith reminds me of my mother so much. It is so good for me to be around her. I miss Mom Hope so much and my mother has been gone for so long. I like her husband of 31 years also. Glenn's dad live just two blocks from his house. The work on things together and have a good relationship. His dad taught him how to fix so many things. If it is fixable why ever get a new one. (clearly that will be a problem with us) but workable.</div><div>Don't know what else to say, I am very happy and so in love, I wonder how in the world I get to be in love twice. That GOd would give me someone so wonderful for the first 25 years of life and now I get to start a new life with another great man. I just say thank you and don't have to get why I am so blessed.</div><div>Kiss hug love on those you love, I am continually reminded how precious life is.</div><div><br /></div><div>Brandon was at the restaurant he works at when a man had a hear attack, it was absolutely horrible, Brandon said he so know what it looks like for life to leave a person and he said he knew right when it happened. People tried to revive him. He was dead when ambulance got there. Bless their hearts. Michael was there too. They are both going to go and learn cpr. They felt like if people had known how to do it right maybe he would have lived. All of that going on when I was waiting. </div><div>We are constantly being reminded that life if so very fragile.</div><div><br /></div><div>I am so grateful for you friends that have been on this journey of life and death and now love, thank you so much.</div>Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-18539424574437743162009-10-28T05:35:00.000-07:002009-10-28T05:52:57.420-07:00Good morning, It has been forever since I wrote.<div>The walk for Mom Hope ALS was a couple of weekends ago. Glenn went with me. I am so blessed with family. Fred and Sharon Harold and the kids were so welcoming to Glenn. We had a great time. I can't even imagine how hard it was for them. It was such a bitter sweet for me. </div><div>Fred and Mary Beth came for Michael's shower last sat. I again am amazed at the church family. They lavished them with gifts. I pray still for my sons to see how great God is. I know it is through the body that they will. </div><div>Glenn goes with me to the Wed</div><div> bible study and we are really enjoying it. The group has great couples in it. New friends for me and new friends for him.</div><div>Samuel turns 19 on Fri. He is not coming home till the next weekend. I have never missed a birthday with him, makes a whole in the heart for sure. He is having toooo much fun.</div><div>All the kids have met Glenn, that was a journey within its self. Michael has been so grown up about everything. He is such a people person, has a way of making people feel so at ease. Haven't spent much time with Brandon lately. He has also been good. Samuel just met him once. Mollie has been warming to the idea. It is so hard for them, it is so hard for me.</div><div>I have been asked to post a picture of us. It is so hard to do. Like I am betraying Mike. Our minds go to so many places, I know without a doubt if Mike met Glenn he would love him and be so proud of me. I am thankful for all the conversations we had about me marrying some day. Fred has been the best. He talked to the boys and challenge them with how Mike had been clear that he wanted that for me. He said Peggy loves to be married and I want that for her. It helped so much. When Fred was here he and Glenn fixed my dryer and worked on some things. It was so helpful for me. He is a real handy man.</div><div>Ok here are the pictures.</div>Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-6035716371837041732009-10-06T09:45:00.000-07:002009-10-06T10:02:32.097-07:00Fall is here I can't believe it. I feel like the summer just simply went away. The weather here is so gorgeous.<div>The two older boys are putting a blade for snow on a 4 wheeler to do snow removal this winter. They are working so hard at their business. They have Mikes work ethics, actually so many of his gifts I see in the children. Sometimes it is like watching him do something when I watch them. </div><div>I have the baby room up and going. I got a baby bed at a garage sale for $15, perfect find. I can't believe that in a short time we will have a little one. Cara has a semester I think to finish college, so I am trying to find a day that would be good to help with the baby. I would have to have a set day. So much change. I couldn't be more proud of Michael he is really taking care of things.</div><div>I don't hear from Samuel, I text and most of the time I get nothing back, Pooh. He might be coming home for the weekend.</div><div>Mollie is still not liking school but bless her heart she goes and does a great job at the academic part. I feel like she has been robbed of her little girl years and the silliness of high school.</div><div>My friend Glenn and I attend a bible study on Wed night and this week it is at my house. We are having dinner and fire pit. I am really looking forward to it. </div><div>Ok now my gripe secession. I work to thunder and pouring rain. What do I think when it rains, hurry go look at the gutters. First my car windows were down, darn. Then the gutters were running over, in my rob I went outside and in seconds was drenched, pooh. Came inside to vacuum and the vacuum was totally clogged, rats. Worked on that forever it seemed, fixed that, then tried to run the dish washer and it now won't close. I think the latch is broken. I thought I was going to have a melt down. I did cry a bit and then had to run car pool, when 2 blocks from school Mollie's IBS was in full throttle. I had to take her home and let her use the rest room and take some medicine. Then I ran to the grocery because I don't have the time today or tomorrow to get stuff for the dinner, I ran home and took her back to school. Blah, Blah Blah. You know the story if you are a mom. I had a client coming 15 minutes after I got back. Took a deep breath and turned out some beautiful color. Praise for that.</div><div><br /></div><div>Psalms, 139: 7-10</div><div>Where could I go from your spirit? Or where can I flee from your presence? If I ascend into Heaven, you are there,, If I make my bed in hell,</div><div>Behold you are there, If I take the wings of the morning ad dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and the right hand shall hold me.</div><div><br /></div><div>For that today I am very grateful.</div><div>I send hugs and kisses to you and an I love you.</div>Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-144735084946334912009-09-16T07:10:00.001-07:002009-09-16T07:22:00.819-07:00I feel like it is forever since I have written in this blog. The face book thing is just too overwhelming to me.<br />I have learned so much lately about grieving. It is hard to believe that we are having a harder time now then like 6 months ago. Anger seems to be the things now. All of us, well I don't know about Samuel.<br />He is doing really well at school. He came home labor day and it was so good to see him.<br />My business has picked up so that is so good. I am enjoying it so much. I went to a cutting class this last Sunday. I learned so much and loved it.<br />The months seem to be flying by. I find it hard to believe that the leaves are changing. My friend helped me to get the vegetable garden put to bed for winter. Sad to see it all go away.<br />I barter to go to my trainer and it is so good for me. I feel better then I have in years. Getting ready to carry a grand baby. Cara looks so good and is doing such a good job. It is so fun to see her grow and to know it is a little sweet pud-den in there.<br />To start Jan. turning 50 and then to end the year with a little baby how good is that. I do believe my mom she always said life begins at 50. We are planning on going to Donnas for Christmas. I am already looking forward to it.<br />I am still going dancing every Thursday. I like it so much. It is so good to just escape in the music. Line dancing is great, good exercise and such nice people. I like the old couples with the young people. Glenn is a great dancer and we have a blast. Good for me. It helps get me through the week.<br />Hope you are out and about enjoying the weather it is amazing right now. Did the fire pit with my neighbors (precious friends) on Sat, was so relaxing.<br />Make a great day!!!!!!!!!!!Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-66968335222735695342009-08-21T17:48:00.000-07:002009-08-21T17:54:59.787-07:00He is gone, Samuel says he likes the set up his room. I have even text-ed him and he has not went me one back. I got his room cleaned up and ready. Changed the bathroom down stairs to a girl bathroom. It looks good. It is a strained time for MOllie and I. Much change in our lives. It is hard for me the house is empty to me. <br />I enjoy dancing so much. I didn't realize how much I had missed dancing. I really enjoy dancing with Glenn. I really enjoy him, such a gentlemen. He reminds me actually of my father in law. Funny isn't that. He likes to read manuals and fix engines and whatever.<br />I am having a really good time. I had missed this so much, just enjoying someone. My family is not one that lets me talk to them about all this. I do understand it is just hard. I'd like to bring him to church but I don't think Mollie would appreciate that. In time I'm sure. Hope you are out enjoying this weather. Funny how God gives you what you need not necessarily what you thought you wanted. Kari said that to me. <br />I get to go out on a date tomorrow with just him dancing. I am so excited Ususally we are with lots of other people. Enjoy the day.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-15026459591901582942009-08-19T05:48:00.000-07:002009-08-19T06:00:40.335-07:00Insanity has hit. Getting Samuel ready for school. He did the work I just put out the dollars, he really did do a great job. He has been such a delight to raise. I was thinking no driving tickets no wrecks, always made great grades, didn't miss curfew. Besides he is such a sweet person. For all that I have been so grateful.<br />I told him I thought check in day was the 19th he told me no it is the 18, are you sure, check for me? no it's the 18th. I moved all clients so I could take him on Tues, Samuel comes up two days ago and says oh by the way it is the 19th, maybe it got changed. I asked Michael to take him. Samuel didn't mind but I was sick to death. Cried and felt so sorry for myself.. Mollie reminded me and my friend Debbie that I should try. I decided even if I loose all clients it would be worth taking Samuel. I couldn't get a hold of some of them so Michael took him this morning. I had prayed about it and if it would be best for him to take him work it out. I think now as I was crying and holding Samuel, it is for the best. The two boys all up in the car with it loaded down, so ready.<br />Beore I could be so sad this am, I wanted to kill him, I have lost some weight and changed sizes and have not had clothes, I went and got some shirts and a skirt, They were all in the washer which he wanted to dry his bed spread, (that I am mad he is taking, he said they got it for me, but it matches the room and the shams, Pooh!) He put the bed spread in dryer with my clothes on high, I now have the tiniest shirts and shirt in the world. Like 3 or my old shirts and 5 new ones. Steam was pouring out of my brain. I did hold it together and went in the bathroom and cried. (did I tell you I am a little emotional) <br />I made Mollies bathroom girlie. Mary Beth had painted it when she was here, I had been saving some things to do while she was at school. Looked really cute.<br />I have still been going out with the guy I talked about before. I am really having fun and enjoy him so much as a person. He is a fabulous dancer so that is so fun for me.<br />Mollie is back in school and I think did pretty well for the first day considering how she felt about goingback.<br />Squeez hug and tell your loved ones that you do. When I saw them pull away today I thought you know you really could never see them again. Hold every moment.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-12316509777899557142009-08-11T18:00:00.000-07:002009-08-11T18:26:23.413-07:00It has been so long since I have written. I don't even know where to start. I am grieving some. Hannah left yesterday. I waited outside for her to come out in her little lawyer outfits and say goodbye for the day. Then I found myself waiting for her to come home today. She was a precious roomie. I got so used to her being around.<br />I am getting Samuel ready to go to college next Tuesday. I can't believe he is leaving. I am so excited for him but am feeling a big loss.<br />Today was the craziest day ever. I am swamped with hair, because of school starting. It has been a slow summer, the economy has had clients coloring their own hair and going longer between hair cuts. I totally understand but strange. SO now I am buisy like crazy for a couple of weeks, and what did I do. I cut the biggest flap in my finger. My last cut on a head. It was with my chunking shears. They are new. An excuse for me. It is the biggest hole I have cut. Usually it is a clean cut this was a triangle flap. It made such since at the time now I am questioning it. I had a suture kit from when I took Michael to Haiti. I thought oh why not just put a couple of stitches in there to hole it together to stop the bleeding? My thinking is at the doctors they to the lidacaine shots that hurt so bad and costs like $150 for the urgent care. I could just make 4 to 6 holes an be done, Ok I did put 3 stitches in my finger and asked my client to tie the knots. I have gotten much grief but when I was doing it, it was perfectly since able. I had like 30 minutes till the next client came. It worked for the day, I used gloves when washing and it felt good till I got off. I went next door, he is a doctor and asked how I should care for it now. Someone had told me to soak it. He said no and said you know you aren't' supposed to do that to your self. I wanted to say ya like duh! He is a really nice guy and helped with advice. We will see tomorrow.<br />I just got done mowing the yard and am out on the porch. MOllie and Samuel are gone for the evening and it is so nice to just veg.<br />I will tell you that I have gone on a first date. A perfect first date with a wonderful gentlemen. A great way for me to have a first date. I was so proud of myself. I told all the kids, MIchael said he would be there when he picked me up and maybe the other boys. I told the guy, sorry I really don't know what to expect, but Michael was a perfect gentlemen. The man said he was glad that he would do that for me. (I will say I was a little anxious about all three of them there)<br />I had butterflies and was sorta sick to my stomach and thought I would back out right before. I did great and had a blast. Not my soul mate but a great time. Went 4 wheeling and the lake. I learned so much about myself. Much of what I did not like. GOd was teaching me yet again the areas that I need to grow in. I had to tell God ok couldn't I have just had a day I wasn't learning<br /> charactor flaws.<br />I go every thursday to the country western place to dance. I love line dancing and I get such a kick out of all the old couples that are so precious. SO many ages of people, I like that. <br />I danced every week 3 or 4 times a week before I got married and MIke wasn't a dancer. His dad is a great dancer but he did not get that gene. I went and realized how much I love it. I really look forward to it. They teach free lessons on wed, I am going to go with a couple from church this wed. It is what I look forward to.<br />I am thinking of taking some classes for swing this fall at the adult education. I did put in a call to a guy that I babysat for when he was 2 on for a while and he does the swing. I asked him to teach me, if he will I will do that.<br />I keep thanking God for all he has done in my life these last two years. Such care he has taken of my family. I am eagerly awaiting my grand baby. Cara looks so good. She is so showing now. It is amazing that a little person, my person is growing in her. I pray for them in all the decisions that they are trying to make. Michael has such a precious heart. He called and asked how he was to register when it is a mistake that he made. He didn't say it just like that but I said oh my goodness there is a person in there that is who we are going to bless. Gods person. He is going to be a wonderful father. For that I am thankful,<br /><br />Kiss hug all those that you love really we do not know when and if there will be a time that we get to again. I have learned that for sure. God is good all the time.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-46855272402543016452009-07-23T11:24:00.000-07:002009-07-23T11:33:24.685-07:00Good day, I am in between clients and wanted to post how our anniversary day was. My friend brought dinner so we all just set and ate and enjoyed each other. I loved them all there. I went with Brandon's girlfriend Ashley to the country dancing place. Had a great time am planning on going tonight also, I just go while they do the teaching and they stay later. I love to two step. Ashley said oh look at me I am spinning. That is how I feel like a princess. I always have loved to dance. Mike's dad is a good dancer but Mike didn't seem to learn from him. Ha. He was really good when he learned. We just didn't have that kind of time when he was here. I hate that we missed that.<br />I made basil pesto this morning for Hannah's lunch and mine. Yummy.<br />Sharon and Mollie and I are going somewhere for our vacation. We are planning on driving straiht through to Deston. A quick trip Sharon has to be back and I don't have much time off. I am looking for a break for sure. Just like everyone. I saw some of the flowers start to come out that are the end flowers, I sorta got sad thinking of Mollie back in school and Samuel off to college. I will miss him so much, I know it is close but it is still gone. He is ready though and has so much to look forward to. Have a beautiful day.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-50289781384895302462009-07-16T06:33:00.000-07:002009-07-16T06:42:36.384-07:00I have the best God story. Yesterday I was making a slide show of the last five years, just doing select all and then show. While I was doing hair I about fainted. I heard Mike's voice, I turned around to the longest video of Mike and three of the kids at the beach. It was after his chemo before his liver surgery. Playing in the sand, it started out where he had buried Mollie in the sadn and was just sitting there watching her trying to get out. So precious. She was just 12 and looked so happy about life. Had no idea what all was coming. The two lady's in the shop were perfect, we just stared. <br />Cara had flowers delivered today, they were here by 8, couldn'y have asked for a better start to a morning. Debbie is bringing dinner. I was struggling with getting to the store and all the kids and their girlfriends, hannah and trev, Hannah is extremely helpful. But now I just have to work today. I was so grateful to God for giving me the movie of Mike. You kept thinking oh now he will be home anytime. So weird our brain.<br />Hanny said she didn't know what to say, happy aniversary or sad aniversary. I sid happy for sure. I was so grateful he got to die. Today two years ago around 1:00 is when he died. Precious man, the love of my life.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-41959902444874755242009-07-15T08:01:00.000-07:002009-07-15T08:02:43.229-07:00Michael and Cara are having an ultrasound today. I look forward to seeing the pictures, Praying for a healthy baby. Have a wonderful day.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-69605109706118222952009-07-15T07:38:00.000-07:002009-07-15T07:41:46.086-07:00I cleaned my shop for like 3 hours. I felt like Mike had made it so gorgeous and I had let it get behind cleaning. It looks so great. I wiped down all the beautiful base board he had put in. It felt good, like a great thing to do to honor him. You keep thinking you don't want people to forget him. He is not talked about or his name said. Mollie felt the same, it is like he isn't thought about. I know people do, but it is just how you feel.<br />I work all day, and tonight Hannah and MOllie and I are going to the new Harry Potter movie. More pictures.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-46947466156789840422009-07-14T06:29:00.000-07:002009-07-14T06:46:51.154-07:00Good morning. I took Mollie to work, she had wrecked her bike and it is in the shop. She said that last week was the best week of her life. She said she was sad I didn't get to do more with them. Before Mike died I would have been there most of the week. That makes me so sad. She said she wished I could have heard the stories of what God had done. She shares some. But it is not like being there. I keep thinking just keep going Peg it will be over soon. Really? No it won't be. I am missing him really bad. He would just love what I have done and the vegetable garden. He would have freaked to have me bring in fresh broccoli. Trying to see the good. If he would have been here I wouldn't have done all this. I would be doing the things I did as a wife, he would be working all the time and Iwouldn't have had time to do it. It would be just now in our lives that we would be doing the things we planned on. Just MOllie home, and the boys gone. No more games and running. I LOVED the running and games and kids here but now is the time that we planned on. I encourage you if you are at this point in your life for goodness sake make that time to do things with just your spouse. None of you know how long you will get to have him or her. I have clients all the time that are waiting for the retirement to do things. Don't take the little trips, hikes, camping.<br />Samuels Apple that he couldn't use at the Engineering Dept is now mine. That is why I am selling the desk one. Tell me if you know anybody. Anyway, I had bought him the $100 private classes with an apple person once a week for a year. I am now using it. Oh my goodness I have learned so much. I love this laptop. I hated being stuck in the office. If you know me will it was like being in a straight jacket. Now my quicken, everything is where I can go to the porch. (where I am right now with my coffee, listening to the water fall.) I am able to make myself get on more.<br />Funny how God is so gentle with us teaching us new things. I actually am liking all this. I use the laptop in the shop to make new appointments and then automatically it goes onto the phone appt. calendar, YEAH!!!!!!! I mean how great is that? No more syncing. Oh I hated that. I found out really I wasn't syncing anyway. It just said it was done and it really wasn't on there. I don't know what I would have done without Dave my brother in law. I was at the end of functioning, thought all of the calendar was lost. He worked and worked, and now I have it all. (I am still a little paranoid at dropping it.)<br />God sent me Hannah for this time to adjust to very little going on here. Kids are gone. I don't see the two older boys hardly at all. Samuel is camping, and Mollie works during the day and does her thing in the evening.<br />We are having a dinner on Thurs to be together on the anniversary. <br />More pictures.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-62945917633152160522009-07-13T14:30:00.000-07:002009-07-13T14:31:27.237-07:00I put so many pictures on the web, I need to do that. I will post some everyday. I want to see our lives. He was just so darling such a beautiful man.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-61660028739598368122009-07-13T13:23:00.000-07:002009-07-13T13:51:10.472-07:00I guess I keep thinking if I don't say it, it really won't be true. Mike has been gone for two years. I feel so sick about it. Like how could it be. I can't stop thinking about him. I miss his gentle spirit his patience with me. The way he found things that I lost, he always closes the doors I open. My life seemed all alright when he would spoon around me. No matter what was going on when his arms would go around me I would think "See it's all alright"<br />I still feel such a void. Like I am always missing something.<br />I was to go with my friend to Marco Island. We got 89 dollar tickets, and were to drive her friends moms car back. I have been struggling with thinking I shouldn't go. Mollie is at camp, counseling. I decided that I wouldn't go. Hannah was so good to say I think that is the right decision. I appreciate her. It was my carrot to get through the summer. It seemed so far away when we booked it. I want to do something with Mollie the first week of aug. I feel much better about it now.<br />The kids and I are going to have dinner together for Mike's two year.<br />Some of you know already that I am to be a grandma. Michael is having a baby the 10th of Dec. He is so precious, trying so hard to get some things together. He and Cara go to all the appointments together. I know he is hurting so knowing his dad won't meet his baby. I always looked so forward to MIke and I being grandparents together. We would have rocked. Taking the kids camping and he was always so good to play and love on little ones. Makes them feel so special. <br />Michael and Brandon are working so hard with their new business. Some days they mow 30 yards. Then they both work at Domenic's at night. Not every night.<br />Samuel is enjoying his summer with friends. They have been camping, floating, and lots of fishing. He has some good friends that I am glad he has.<br />Our youth group here did a mission trip here. The kids knocked doors, asking the people if they needed anything done, like yard, shrubs, cleaning things out. Then they asked the people if they oculd pray for them. I am so proud of them. There they were up on the porches holding hands with the people prayng with them. They worked everyday dong chores in the heat. Mollie loved it. Jeremy (youth minister) had 30 kids from Houston come in and all the kids stayed at the Webster University dorms. New friends for life. It was precious hearing the stories and how Big God is. <br />I really just want to get through the week. I know the kids are struggling, what do you even do with all this. I don't know but to keep on stepping forward. Everyday I see God's great love for me. I am grateful that I am still working out and feeling healthy.<br />I did a wedding yesterday a client that raised her boys herself for 13 years and now found a precious man. One week before the wedding her 17 year old son was diagnosed with Hodgkin Lymphoma. Today he starts his first chemo. Life is precious, health is not to be taken for granite. Things like that just puts everything in prospective.<br />St. Louis is hopping, the All Star Game is here. So many activities, exciting for our city.<br />I need to tell you thank you for sticking with me these last years. Knowing that you read and care if a real gift. I want to tell you thank you so much.<br />I can almost see Mike drive in the drive with a big smile, ready for dinner. I can't stop crying, wish it would go away.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-37152370626655330392009-06-25T09:34:00.001-07:002009-06-25T09:44:54.857-07:00I have a new found serious appreciation for farmers. I get so upset over the plants having bugs. Hannah brought in a zucchini stem upset and took it to the gardener and he told us we had bores and it didn't look good. Then on our tomato plants there are beetles. The nerve of them. It has been as you know in the 90's. Hannah worked long and hard in the heat yesturday weeding and trying to powder the plants with natural remedies. She looked like a drowned rat when she came in.<br />I don't see the two oder guys much. They are spending many hours mowing and working. I don't know how they do it in the heat. Then they go home and nap and then go to work in tuxedos serving. Yulk the thought of dressing up after being so hot.<br />Samuel came home almost sick. He worked in a garage at the mowing place or outside from like 9-5. Drenched and weak. I am proud of the way they are such hard workers. Mollie works everyday from 8-2. She has to ride her bike back and forth. I watch her pull in all red cheeked. She is making good money and I think she is learning alot. The youth group had a slmuber party in Ill. She could not stay so I had to go and get her at like 10:30. Hard when you have to work the next day. <br />I won't even begin to explain my computer fiasco but I have a apple desk computer, new if anyone is in the market. (Did I say I have a love hate rrelationship with computers?)<br />I hope your day is going well and you are able to see God in all you do.<br />I got on face book, talk about exhausting. No way will I be able to do that. I can't even get on long enough to get my emails. Quicken is calling my name. I have not done well keeping up with the book keeping this summer. Oh well. <br />My moms flocks are absolutely gorgeous. Purple beautiful purple.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-79141622344799316522009-06-24T06:55:00.001-07:002009-06-24T06:58:23.626-07:00I am enjoying the garden so much. Hannah and I pick in the am and eat zucchini, onions and peppers in our eggs. There is something so rewarding about eating from your own bounty. Hannah is fun to watch she just loves life. It is a gift to get to be with her. I see my sister in her willingness to do for others.<br />I work in just a minute just wanted to get the pictures on here first.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-36712334211962640872009-06-18T06:17:00.000-07:002009-06-18T06:40:39.271-07:00I went with Samuel to <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Mizzou</span> for orientation. It was so good for me to get to see where he is going and his dorm and some of his professors. He is now in the College of Engineering at University of Missouri. I think he felt much better about all of it, what is expected and how they can help. I am so happy for him to get to have this opportunity. I stayed with some of our friends. (my mom an dads from Columbia) it was so good to be with them.<br />The shower went just great. They got some nice gifts and all the kids were so fun to watch.<br />Mollie got to go to high teen week at our church camp. I have been so excited to get to hear how fun it was. The house so strange without her. It has been nice not having to think where she is and does she need a ride home.<br />She is working everyday Mon - <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Fri</span> at the early childhood development at one of the schools. She works from 8-2. I am grateful for her job.<br />Boy I feel like time is just rushing by. I have had a wonderful two weeks. I have wanted a pond for many years. Mike drilled me a hole in a rock a long time ago so I would have the fountain part of the pond. I now can't move it so I got creative and made a small fall. I dug a pond. I used a college guy to wheel the dirt away. <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">OK</span> so now <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">the</span> small pond is 14 x 12, parts of it 2 feet deep. it makes such a sweet sound. I have been gathering rocks for around 10 years. Whenever I see free rocks I just get them. Now it is gathering them from around the yard. The rain was so terrible that I thought it would wash away but it held firm.<br />I went to get granddaddy a card the other night. I had no idea I was going to get hysterical. It hits you when you are not ready. I started reading cards, started thinking of the ones Mike would get his dad. I moved to the ones for fathers and then I saw a little girl card that was so perfect for the two of them. I <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">bought</span> it anyway. I stood there sobbing and kept on reading thinking maybe I <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">could</span> get the and mail them just <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">somewhere</span>. It was the most terrible feeling to think that I did not get to get him a card, I did and wrote in my head what I would say. What on earth. I was in there on the 16<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">th</span> Mike's 23 month since his death. I don't know how it has happened that it is so long. I want to show him the pond. He <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">would</span> love to sit out there. It sounds like the little rivers when we would go camping.<br />There have been struggles lately that have made me think so much of my parenting. I know that we all make mistakes but it the not <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">continuing</span> them that is so important to me. I am trying so hard to let them be there own men,. To listen and not ask questions that are <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">irritating</span>. God has been growing me up again. I keep telling him to build <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11">character</span> in my children but to leave me out of it. Funny how that doesn't work. <br />The garden is starting to produce fruit. We have <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_12">zucchini</span> , yellow squash, onions, peppers, lettuce, our <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_13">broccoli</span> is done. It is so good to eat fresh.<br />Hannah has been the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_14">biggest</span> God send for me. To say good morning and walk and have coffee with her, is wonderful. To talk of God and what we are <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_15">confidently</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_16">expecting</span> in our lives. Isn't that what Hope is about? Confidently expecting God to do great things in our lives. That is His promise to us. Knowing in all things he works good. I believe that and want to be still and watch it unfold. It is good for me.<br />I pick up Mollie sat and look forward to her being home.<br />Pray specifically for me to get some paper work done for the hospitals. I have much to send in. I am now done with <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_17">Samuel's</span> stuff. Met with the financial people at the college. I felt small. Of course I only saw all the mom and dads that where together. Holding hands and doing it together. (Don't tell me there where other singles too, duh! I know that) I just said that is who I saw.<br />Again, make it a day that you tell someone you love them. Hug them say the words. Who knows in life when and if we <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_18">will</span> get to meet again. I have so many people I love and think of. My life is so full of blessings. I tell Samuel I am the most blessed women I know. He said I need to get out more. So funny.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-83275192375593665292009-06-08T18:52:00.000-07:002009-06-08T19:18:23.635-07:00I had mentioned my niece Hannah living with us this summer. Well it is absolutely the greatest thing ever. It is so wonderful to wake up with an adult and we make coffee and then make breakfast, and a few of the mornings we work out together. I feel like sometimes she is the mature one. Such a fun person. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Ok</span> I am still in shock over this one. At dinner time she asked me if I was hungry, (that was shocking enough) then she said what would you like? Really? Are you kidding me. I don't even know if I have been asked that in our family. Mike wasn't the cook type guy, and I <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">dont</span>' think the kids have ever thought that sentence. She made dinner, brought me a glass of wine. She picked oregano and basil from the garden and used fresh vegetables, she made the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">suace</span> from scratch. She then said oh we can eat it in the living room I'll just bring it to you guys. Mollie and I were watching the Jonas Brothers show. I know my mouth was hanging open. Do you want something to eat are you hungry? Really!!! <br />Today we went to <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">Cosco</span> and got some of the stuff for the shower we are having for the Hayes family. When we got home, I had problems with the gutters with the last storm we had a few days ago. The tree limbs are touching the roof and I hadn't cut them yet. She got out the ladder and got on the roof and cut on the limbs and dug out the gutters. I am actually afraid to get up there. Mike had put me up there to help with something when I was pretty pregnant and I had a fear freeze and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">couldn't</span> get myself off the ladder. Weird I know, it was so great to get it done. I then went to work. Trevor had stopped by and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Hannah</span> is sick, temp soar throat, she is down for the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">count. I have been digging </span>on my pond. Mike had drilled me a big rock for the pond and said someday I would get it done. I love that he the rock, I dug for two days with a college friend. My arms were so soar. Then it stormed and I was out there this am making the cover stay on. I can see it all in my brain. It has been there for a long time. I could sit out on the porch and pretend hearing it. Also my girlfriend is giving my her baby coix, so it needs to get going. I have the pump from another water thing we had. It will be so gorgeous. A relaxing paradise to me.<br />I leave for a day and a half to go with Samuel to college for a orientation type thing. I will get to meet with the finance department. Oh yeah paper work. I say often so I hear it I am so good at paper work it is just not a problem for me. I have been home bound recently on my own liking to be there doing <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">piddly</span> things. <br />I sometimes can't stop thinking of my friend Kathy, hating her having to go through radiation. She has a good attitude, knows God is faithful.<br />Life is so short you really have to relish the moment don't you?Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3311976166089233245.post-60672566671234802412009-05-31T09:34:00.000-07:002009-06-01T09:00:29.280-07:00It hard to say that my dads service was one of the most special times of my life. My father had brain surgeries (2), the man I knew as a child was not the one I knew as an adult. I would tell my kids of camping and trips and him paying on the floor with us. His survival questions and all the people he had influenced in his life. They were hard pressed to remember that. I felt I had grieved his death many years ago, but had not had the opportunity to see all of the man he was.<br />People got up and told their stories, it was amazing the lives he touched the people he brought to know the Lord, the was his generosity had touched so many. I was so grateful that the children had the chance to see all the people who talked and came to remember my dad. They were surprised and frankly so was I. I had forgotten so many of the stories and had not even heard some of them. The talking after was when I heard over and over that my dad had taught and mentored people. My sister mentioned in her talk how my dad would argue one side of the story, mostly why do you believe that, and then when you thought you had been clear he would get on the other side and argue that. He would teach you to think on your own, (which at times I think they wouldn't have been so good at teaching us that). He is the one who made me so good in emergencies. Always making us think fast. You would be driving down the highway and he would say "Your car goes in the river and you are going under water what would you do first?" It is burned on my brain all these facts.<br />So many told of my dads brilliance, They did not know a more well read man. He was a continuous learner.<br />It was refreshing to my soul to hear and see the pictures of the father I had know as a young girl. My sister did a fabulous job of getting everything together.<br />The church family out did themselves. Food, snacks dinners, home made everything. As a family we were just missing Monty and that was a big loss. He had had Emily come from Nigeria, and he had to stay and work. Well the babies were not here either but we were so glad for Wes and Martha to get to enjoy sitting and being with family. We all stayed on Mary Beth's house. It is a perfect home to all be together. She is just able to run things where you feel comfortable. Everyone pitches in, the kids played out Botche ball in the dark with lights hanging from the trees, and the fire pit was going. I have sute pictures of the girls not wanting to let their hair smell like fire so they put their bandanas on. The kids on the way home siad Mom that was a good time.<br />We came home early because the teams that Brandon and Samuel coach have made it to the play offs and they have all the games today.<br />Michael and Cara come home today and Hannah will be back tomorrow. My heart feels so much better to know how all the others remember him.<br />I will get a copy and put in the letters my sisters read, they were beautiful.<br /><br />I have been loving this.<br />Psalms 62: 5-8 "Find rest, O my soul in God alone, my hope comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge."<br />I do love that we can pour out our hearts to him. Have a blessed day. Squeeze and hug and speak the words of love.Peggy Hopehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10295656984666602159noreply@blogger.com0