I worked late afternoon, after picking up Mollie and going to the grocery store to get the dinner for Mike's birthday. Samuel had a lacrosse game that we were all at. It was so wonderful, our neighbors from across the street went to the game too. I came home and cooked dinner thinking that it was so totally weird to cook his favorite meal and him to not show up. Mollie had to stay for the second game she is the score keeper, so the guys had to wait to eat. If you have boys you know how that is.
I got out a piece of paper and had them talk about what we are going to put on his stone. I got it finished by the time they all left. Dinner was good. I started to pray and then cried and couldn't finish. Silence followed, then a good conversation for dinner. They all cleaned up everything without being asked. It was a group affair and I really enjoyed that. Since we had missed being with Michael for his birthday we all told him what we liked about him. That is my favorite part, I love to hear them say things to each other.
At 9 two sweet friends came over. One celebrating finishing a counseling degree, one celebrating packing part of the house and getting that off her chest and me celebrating the day being over. We sat by the fire an djust chatted and laughed and enjoyed life together. I really needed it. At 11:15 they went home and I felt like I had made it through another mile stone. One that I had dreaded. Id on't know why I dread GOd always and I mean always works it out for me.
I go to the Dr. tomorrow in the morning and then work late afternoon until the evening.
I am going to go to the stone place to order MIke's tomb stone. I think I have had such a hard time with that because it is like it is so final to see the 5/6/60-6/16/07. Like it isn't final already. I guess to see it in the ground would mean he is not coming back, it is finished, never agian to think he would just be driving in the drive at any minute. Today I worked on some things in the yard and I got excited to think that I would show MIke. It is funny how he intertained me with letting me show him all I did in a day. He really liked it when I would show him around at what I did. Now it is myself that I show. Different places in the yard I did for him because it is where he would look the most or where he sat. The void is so huge. I want to encourage you to love on your mates. It takes so little time to show love and appreciation. To have your kids honor their parent. Make the time, kiss, hug, tell, tell, tell them of all the things taht you love about them. It is midnight and I am heading to bed feeling like I did a good job of today. Thank you for the prayers and phone calls.
My D'Ann called today and said for me to celebrate all the great birthdays that I did for mIke. It is true I did do up birthdays. I had fun thinking of the surprised and kidnapping him and taking him away. Good time.